Poverty Is A Sin

What if, pray tell, we discover one day that poverty was a sin all along? Well, it will be too late then but just think about it. As for me, I do not want to wait until it’s too late. An ancient Greek philosopher said ‘mapema ndio best’ and these words couldn’t be any truer now than it was back then. 

I have thought deeply about this like any man capable of thinking reasonably from time to time. For that matter, I expect myself to make myself filthy rich with the least amount of effort and within the shortest time possible. You do not have to have a particularly high IQ to reach such an intellectual conclusion. Me, I have purposed to be rich for the past three years or so years. Somewhere along the Adulting Road, I realized that my obsessions cost a lot of money. And just like the next person, I could use a million shillings. 

I do not believe that money cannot buy happiness. Or love. Anybody who tells you that money cannot buy happiness has more money than he ever needs, is terminally ill, or is dead. You must have too much money to make certain conclusions about money. As broke as I am, I am 93.27% sure that money will set me on the path toward happiness. Think about things money can do. Point of correction; think about things a lot of money can do. You could be a complete moron and people will still applaud you. In some extreme circumstances, you might even believe them thinking that you are a “person of the people.” However, when election results are announced, you realize that even your close family members pretend to like you. I think that’s the worst way to use your millions. 

It saddens me to think that there are people who still think that money cannot buy love. I do not blame them. Again, this is a rich-people problem, and they should never ever think that we subscribe to such nonsense. It has been proven scientifically that money can actually buy love. According to Dave Barry, a humor scientist who specialized in a branch of science known as ‘making things up,’ money can buy love – it can buy a lot of high-quality fake love. If you can buy fake love, what is the point of buying low-quality? 

Your worldview does not matter. Money makes life a whole lot better and easier. When you have money and you are bored, you could hire a hitman to kill boredom. And that’s not even the best part – the best part is that you can afford a lawyer (for purposes of this article, a lawyer is anyone who can throw a cocktail of big English and Latin words and wears suits). 

There are so many ways to make too much money and quickly. However, most of them are either illegal or scams. I have lived long enough to know this. There is no point in having millions of money and constantly hiding. It is the main reason we elect people with questionable characters to lead. They have been out there doing ‘shady business deals’ and when they cannot hide anymore they offer themselves up for election. It is the surest way to being untouchable and making even more money quite effortlessly. Pablo Escobar tried it but failed. 

I have tried gambling, only to realize, dismayed, that I was contributing diligently to someone else's next luxury toy. A job works the same way. I have also realized that schools indoctrinate people to accept slavery as the perfect way to live. They no longer have to forcefully enslave you - you willingly accept to be a slave, sometimes you even beg them.  

I know that I do not possess the right gene to create something as big as Microsoft or Facebook. I’ll settle for what has already been invented – religion. The last time I checked, no other brand has ever outsold Jesus since the five-day workweek. I plan to start a church, preach, and people will give me money on behalf of Jesus. And the best part of it is that I can keep it. Why, because poverty might just be another sinner they forgot to include in the bible. Living a good life isn't a sin, it is what you do when living a good life that might be sin. Like making others feel poor about themselves. 

A Ticket To Hell

I don't know much, 
but one stands clear in my mind, 

it is as clear as stars in a cloudless night 

I know without a shred of doubt

that laughing at the expense of someone else, 

in situations you shouldn't 

will earn you a straight ticket to hell 

I chose to bear my disappointments alone, 

nurse my self-inflicted obsessions in silence 

wondering why I ever became a football fan 

for a team millions of miles away 

a team that wouldn't even recognize me in my lifetime 

yet I chose to be entangled in its business 

revel in its win 

and be so dejected in their losses 

that I find banter so unbearable 

but then, what is life without obsessions? 

Do not laugh at my face 

it's probably a sin to 

to laugh at someone bearing his pain 

in silence 

Makeshift Prisons

The bars appear as beautiful as flowers In a solemn and mournful bloom Watered by silent tears of lost time Watered by broken dreams Of broken hearts

The old dreams adopted the vibrancy of rust

Withered by harsh loneliness

And the pain of disappointment

But then behind bars

Lies the freedom to be nothing

But just be, and flow with the routine

Thoughts have become murky

Harbouring every vermin and pathogen

All ready to devour souls

Just Guesses

I guess the stars that I hoped 

we would lazily gaze at, 

one night when dreaming 

became too much, 

were nothing but a mirage 

I guess the many lonely days

I nursed the pain of your absence,

especially on nights 

I craved your warm embrace, 

were nothing but seconds ticking 

to oblivion 

I guess the dreams we had, 

can now ride our broken hearts, 

ferry us wherever it wants, 

as we search for each other 

among strangers we meet 

The Good, The Bad. The Balance

there will be good days, 

that will make think that you've 

finally figured it out 

there will be bad days, 

days that will test your resolve, 

faith, courage 

there will be days that 

make you feel stuck 

in a rat race 

there will be good, and the bad 

it might be a little difficult sometimes, 

to strike a balance and 

keep moving forward 

but, regardless of any outcome, 

take the next step

When Everything Changed

The vast blue dome above 
Conjured nothing but bliss 
In the air roamed untainted love 
The world was at peace 

All dreams were low-lying fruits 
There was no need for needless exertion 
We lived and loved to bits 
Because we had discovered our passion 

But then everything changed all of a sudden 
The world that we thought was pure 
Threatened to make us heathens 
We were never the same for sure 

An APP For Idlers

 TikTok is one hell of an app. If you have a few hours which you can dedicate to being totally and completely unproductive, then this app is here for you. TikTok has revolutionized how you can idle. It is more like a drug – in fact, it should be classified as a drug. A few minutes on TikTok will have you wondering how time flew by. And the best part of it is that you may never learn anything meaningful. 

It took me a while before I got around to downloading TikTok. I quickly signed up and began a blissful browsing experience. Each video would be more interesting than the last or almost always related to some videos I had watched elsewhere. For instance, I would watch Dr. Pimple Popper on YouTube when my mind suggests that something gross might be interesting. When I turned to TikTok much later, I would find the same gross videos perfectly lined up for me. I did not give much thought to it until the other day. 

Well, the answer lies in the terms and conditions we often blindly accept. We could sell our souls without knowing!!! It turns out that TikTok collects all your data from every possible source. It probably knows the type, make, and color of your underwear. That’s how serious that app is with your personal data. It even collects data on how you strike your keyboard. For what use? I do not know. 

I might say, which is just a wild guess, that TikTok does so to make its users addicted to the app. It is the same strategy that Facebook used. They needed a product that people would come back to it again and again like drug junkies. TikTok is using the same blueprint, only going a little further. Perhaps it is the reason why it has grown so popular around the world. 

One of the most remarkable things about TikTok is that China, where it was developed, restricts its use among its citizens. Chinese children use TikTok as a learning tool, not to showcase their posterior endowments or watch stupid pranks that have become the norm. It is alleged that China switches off the app at night. While the rest of the world becomes dumber and dumber, the Chinese are getting more and more intelligent. 

The only advantage TikTok has is that it has given people a chance to make a living. We recently saw TikTokers building mansions and driving. Well, you either are the consumer or the creator. When a product is free, there are high chances that you are the product. 

As for me, I plan to delete the app and resume life without it. I wouldn’t miss it at all. I need new ways to waste time now that the doctor has asked me to cut some beverages.