The past haunts in strange, sinister way,
like a jilted ex, always lurking by the corner,
As you stroll, trying to be oblivious to it's existence,
It springs from the bushes, startling
And makes it clear it's not a prank,
Heart thumping, dazed
You are lost for words
to explain or extricate oneself,
or explain that she has no use anymore
But she throws that devilish grin
as if to say 'you and me are bound by the hip, Forever '
Some mornings,
the alarm rattles you,
launching into the abyss of the wakeful,
dire mornings,
they force you to acknowledge that you aren't
loved enough,
that you must earn it to live amongst them,
by them, and for them,
dire mornings,
force you to accept that your life doesn't truly belong to you,
and so you crawl out of your bed,
put on mask that's your smile
And face the day like warriors of the yore,
And you assure yourself that you will not dire
in battle of life,
that you won't live for mornings
that show up without meaning
We need distractions aplenty,
we need them not as a cure for
our chronic unhappiness,
but to distract us from our own
impending deaths
The clock ticks ever so imperceptibly
Towards unwelcome death
We need alibis aplenty
Some take to drugs to hurry the date
with the grim reaper,
some take to women, a few whom they
ever learn to love,
And some live without the will to kill themselves,
And, like pendulums, swing back and forth
between drugs
and loose women,
seeking love from hopeless places
You have not met them yet,
No, you haven't,
You haven't met that person
who'll make you lose faith in humanity,
Who will question your existence
You have not met them
In the meantime, enjoy
She is somewhere, missing me
I am here wondering what
things I did to her
If anything, I lived unapologetically,
and loved her
in a carefree manner,
Never at once concerned if she'd leave
I find myself debating with myself,
I have very little money,
And I am trying to find reasons to spend it,
She's asked for some,
Although I wanted her to so I can gleefully tell her I don't have it,
I find no thrill in telling her so,
The fact I'll say it from a point of lack
Robs me that thrill
were I in the proximity of a liquor den,
I'd have had a cheap one
And forgot my existence
for a while
I can't begin to imagine how
it all began
English language was as complex
as nuclear science
My buttocks suffered to my brain
to even begin comprehending
simple English sentence structure
I hated every moment of those lessons
The difference between there and their
sticks to my to date
