I Am Not Sane

I guess you are wondering 
whether the thoughts, 
that glide and dance in my head, 
are the thoughts of a sane man. 

I harbour the same thoughts too, 
the kind of thoughts that graze 
inside this head - a head that's cost 
you a fortune - 
because they are no thoughts of a 
completely sane man 

I must admit, staying sane 
is a toll task on my part 
I am constantly seeking tunes 
bordering on dirges and love songs 
because it is then that the dinghy 
halls in my mind come alive 

Not All Days Are Alike

Not all days are alike

Some feel like a tortuous hike, 

upon lands with unwelcoming vista

the scenery doesn't fit insta 

there are days and nights 

where nothing goes right 

everything is dull 

suspended, with so much to mull 

there will be happy days 

encountered upon lonely highways 

scarce, and unspeakably lonely 

and a soul yearns to be free 

The Warrior

I look forward to the day 

when I'll wave you from the other side 

of River Cheploch, 

and watch your form gradually fade away 

into the beckoning Tugen Hills, 

into the dark and cold embrace of a 

former bandit 

I'll then haul myself up the Kerio 

escarpment, 

listen to the silent voices of my 

ancestors 

jeering at how stupid I was 

for making myself a disgrace in the clan 

for letting the affections of a woman 

turn my head around 

when I get to my father's backyard

I'll hunch over a laptop and write you a 

poem, 

I'll write that I am gathering my bows 

and arrows 

to prepare myself for battle

to rescue myself from the world, 

from you 

Listen, It Happened

listen, it happened

didn't feel like you were hovering

above earth 

feeling so unlike an ordinary mortal? 

didn't you think it was the best thing 

ever?

but then you tumbled down

like an elephant atop a tree

as you nurse your hurt feelings, 

you wish you'd foreseen the crash

but you know, life has no navigation 

Listen, it happened 

when you find yourself in a destination 

not of your liking

isn't prudent to trace your steps back 

brave the underbrush 

make a way in unbeaten paths, 

brave hunger and thirst 

brace yourself to get lost in the 

makeshift jungle of regrets 

survive internal wars - 

monologues,

and finally, a solemn vow to oneself 

not to be gullible ever again 

listen, it happened, 

there is nothing you can do about it 

gazing at the ruins

long enough won't rebuild you 

stop, the ruins aren't even aesthetic 

it happened, brave the simple decision 

to walk away from your former self 

and be each other's eternal enemies 

Detached

I'll be content loving you at a distance, 

detached from all the 'burdens' 

that walk beside affection, 

for by definition of romance, 

I am as imperfect as imperfect can ever be 

I'll be satisfied with not knowing 

about how your day went 

I am not interested in listening 

to whatever slows you down 

I am almost certain there's nothing I 

can do about them

I'll love you in a completely detached manner 

I crave silence, sometimes, 

I can go for days not wanting to talk to you

or see you, 

or be near you, 

unfortunately, that's not how a lover should love 

I'll not love you right

and there isn't much  I can do about it 

we will not speak the same language of love 

and I'll drive you insane 

because I won't seem like I care about 

I'll want you, but never ever admit I need you 

The Best Times

The best of times might as well 

be the worst times, 

because, often times, the good times 

are either illegal, destructive, 

or a death sentence coated with pleasure 

and when everything has passed, 

and all you have are memories 

scrubbing the edges of your mind 

revealing the finely inscribed word - guilt 

henceforth, no matter how much fun 

you had, 

it all boils down to "I shouldn't have had it"

No Longer Friends With Myself

I do not recognize myself anymore, 

a stranger has taken over my body, 

leaving vague recollections of my 

former self 

The body that you see isn't mine, 

I swapped it when being me 

was no longer in vogue 

You might recognize the body, 

but it's run by a different software 

I am no longer friends with myself

tell me a friend whose maid creed is sabotage 

which friends encourages self-destruction

and thinks it is too much fun? 

my former self will say things 

just as strange to you as they are to me 

I do not recognise him 

and we are no longer friends