Ruminating

find me at my usual corner 

drinking the same drink, 

ruminating, 

dreaming about better days, 

trying to outrun my troubles, 

and my haunting past. 

find me by lonely rock 

day dreaming about better days, 

days when everything will be alright 

find me, still, 

ruminating over good days 

that I should be living now 

Vestiges of Affection

the last vestiges of feelings 
still haunt certain parts of my heart
that have not gone dark, or cold
there is still a gossamer of hope 
that I still hold on to whenever
the memory of you, the memory us, 
strikes at odd hours 
when magnetic pull of loneliness 
is stronger than before
when the wails of my heart are loud, 
my feet struggle to take me a further step, 
just one step away from those days 
days littered with memories, 
with love, 
with a thousand eternities 
that we hoped we would mold 
with our bare hands, 
and then I miss you 
and then I call you 
and then your distant voice sounds cold 
and then I regret why I called 

I Wish I Were A Tree

I wish I were a tree 
A eucalyptus tree with a long smooth back
I'd stand inconspicuously among other tall trees with smooth barks.
I'd have grand eucalyptus thoughts, days and nights while
I stretch painstakingly slowly towards the sky
I'd think, for example, that I'd grow up to be a piece of paper
where I'll land on the table of a genius poet
Or his printer.
Or his collection of eerie thoughts conjured up in wee hours of night.
If the poet is a woman, then I'd be content to be her tissue paper,
a tissue paper with a long and smooth bark 

No More Nightmares

the nights are no longer long 
the ticking clock no longer drawls 
I ceased wondering 
about where I went wrong 

time is nigh, I feel it, 
energy gushes out of me 
like a burst water pipe 
I am no longer full of shit 

there are no more nightmares 
the past seems long gone, 
and a gleaming future awaits me 
step by step, I climb up the stares 

The Awakening

In a deep slumber lay a memory,

buried yet it never died, 

it still donned its vital signs 

more like a badge 

a testimony to an unforgettable story

Many moons later, 

the memory awoke, 

dusted itself, 

picked up the relics of its dignity 

and began its familiar routine 

torturing an innocent soul 

whose only crime was 

to love ever so deeply   

The Uncertain Journey

don't I always wish I felt good, 

from the moment I open my eyes, 

to the moment I lay my head to rest 

boy, I how I wish I could 

but it's just a wish in an uncertain journey,

one minute I am so sure about my steps 

the next minute I tumbling downhill 

and, trust me, there is nothing funny 

sometimes I feel the universe cheering me 

and I summon the energy to trudge on 

a minute later, all I hear is the loud jeers 

in an instant, the world becomes blurry 

I wish I could find joy in life's uncertainties

living knowing disappointment by that corner  

and still find the courage to face it 

even if I am granted a thousand such eternities 

If You Meet Meet Me

If we ever meet on a dark street, 

and you recognize me, 

please have the the courtesy 

to mind your business 

like I will 

because it will be our secret