you lay cold on the floor of his heart
teeth clattering amid pleas
of love
Yet every morning, he poured cold water
all over you
knowing how much the water made everything
worse
You pleaded him, promised him cute and intelligent
kids
But he heard none- he was deaf
But, then, you survived
And when you remember how you
thought you couldn't
nothing seems impossible
because there is always a light
even in the deepest recesses of sorrow
the stone throws a hard stare,
like how it has known for staring
staring at vagaries of weather
weathering
a slow disintegration into another
form
or formlessness
or something to gives promise to other lives
yet, for now, the hard stone cold stare
revealing nothing, not even blinking
only a laughter that hides
stories beneath its silence
a stone cold silence
The confining prison grills
are a welcome refuge to prisoners
for they are freer than he
than he whose mind has enslaved him
he is guilty of a cruel fate
a fate that's yet to come
and the ticking seconds
crawl closer to an indefinite execution date
the fall walls of his room
seems like a solitary confinement
no soul to talk to, no walks in the sun
and he is his own cruel prison guard
his life is one long prison stretch
except that the routes of escape are open
yet he makes no attempt at it
because he will shoot himself - or take poison
He said he would
But he was up to no good
He'd become adept at lying
And you'd become adept at believing
You sat by the corner and cried
Tears were a thing you couldn't hide
He was once that perfect soul
A soul that made you whole
And the lies broke you to pieces
The promises came yet he never ceases
He become distant and aloof
And unreliable like a leaking roof
The lies became him,
They become his constant theme
The lies became his only truth
He is silent like a derelict phone booth
He steps into the local
A little inebriated, therefore a little animated
He sees his 'friends'
Friends by the virtue that they commune together
to have fun destroying their livers with cheap liquor
'It's peaceful here,' he says
His wife sells groceries across the road
And there are three teenagers in the house
running wilder than the wildebeests in the Mara
He gulps his vodka, wipes his mouth and scans the area
and declares that he has three teenagers
He says he cannot buy a single bread
because they think it is the biggest joke
after democracy in the African continent
He whines about his job,
his wife, the government, the cosmos, aliens
then leaves for his house -
a place he can't stand a second of sobriety
Because of the marauding teens
By God, it made me think
please do not give me teenagers
I want to drink for other reasons
than teenagers - insatiable teenagers
who have since ceased finding anything humorous
in the old bones that made them who they are
She had an intimidatingly rough face
a face that would 'rough someone up' -
but she was cool, and humble like your grandma
when she is in a jolly mood
But she smoked cigar after cigar
Often tilting her head at a slight angle
as she puffed out, as though she is near
a ground-breaking thought
a philosophical thought that can change mankind
like the nothingness of our existence
But all she ever does is puff away
staring into a blank distance
an unreachable canvass of hers where she draws
beautiful yet obscure dreams of our meaningless existence
She sips her beer, too,
in between puffs too
she is at peace with her demons
You can tell that - everybody can tell that
And she does not care about what you think
she cares about her cigar, and her beer
and the things that make her seek refuge
in her blank, unreachable canvas of hers
a canvas that rejects the notion of carcinogens
she'll probably tell you that nobody knows what causes cancer
she is at peace,
she is peace with her cigar
Really,
What is happiness?
Happiness is a made up word
So that sick and deranged people
can sell drugs to others
happiness is unattainable
happiness is the biggest fallacy
happiness is gaping grave
ever ready to swallow up its next victim
happiness can happen on a whim
it can happen on a wheel
happiness is not a destination
neither is it a journey
happiness was not meant to exist
it is a made up word
so that we can keep buying things we don’t need
